Plot Twist!

Aug. 1, 2014

Doctors say I have fibromyalgia. Once it became my constant, though unwelcome, companion, a friend suggested I give it a name, with the idea that a pet name is less clinical and “whiney” sounding than the medical term. So until I can arrange a divorce or at least a separation, my mate is "Freddie." 

In the course of a seven-year journey, I have become convinced that fibromyalgia is not a condition as such, but a name concocted for a collection of symptoms that the medical community has been forced to recognize as real, but for which no one can agree on a cause, much less a cure. After having worn myself out chasing the magic bullet, I have further come to believe that peace, if not a cure, comes from positive energy – from uplifting thoughts, from gratitude, from association with people we love. One of those people reminded me just this week:

·      My condition does not define me – in other words, I have fibromyalgia (plug in any condition here) – I am not fibromyalgia. I also have fingernails; I am not a fingernail.

·      I do not win or lose – I win or learn.

·      When something goes wrong in my life, just yell, “Plot twist!” and move on.

So this gratitude journal begins because of insights that came all at once this week, thanks to tender mercies from God (little discoveries or feelings that let me know He's aware of me), to my friend who shared inspired thoughts, and to a professor and mentor at college who encouraged me to write about Freddie. At my first Tai Chi class this week, we began with deep-breathing relaxation, which at one point included thinking of something for which we are grateful, which makes us smile. I’ve been thinking every day since that moment of things that make me smile. Those smiles should be recorded – for my own memory when it’s hard to see the sun – and perhaps to lift others who suffer. And along the way, I’ll attempt to tell what I’ve learned about fibromyalgia from doctors and my own research.

Today’s smile:
Watching a Cardinal Couple – literally, a bright red male and a brown female with a red beak – courting in my back yard. They started on the fence, then flew one at a time to the crepe myrtle tree, where they sat side-by-side on a branch for quite a while before flying out of the yard together. But they came back again and again while I was in the pool (another thing to be grateful for!). How can you not love that?!